We all know that the journey of motherhood is filled with challenges, uncertainties, and moments that test our patience. From sleepless nights to tantrums in the grocery store, to creating a science fair project at midnight, being a mother sometimes feels like navigating a never-ending obstacle course. If being a parent was a job, you would be the CEO of chaos management. However, amidst the bedlam and pandemonium, there is one thing that can help us navigate through it all with a little ease – a sense of humor. Striving to do motherhood with humor makes the journey much more enjoyable!
Being a mother is no easy feat, but it certainly becomes a bit more manageable when we learn to laugh at the unpredictable twists and turns that come our way. Whether it’s navigating the interminable list of excuses for not completing chores or the endless messes that seem to magically appear throughout the day, a good laugh can be the perfect antidote to the stress that often accompanies motherhood. There’s one thing that always brings joy to my life—that’s the hilarious things our kids do. From their innocent yet comical observations to their unexpected and sometimes outrageous antics, our children have a way of keeping us on our toes and bringing a smile to our faces. Be sure to document these moments and they will continue to brighten your day for decades to come. Here are a few of my favorite memories with my children, I hope you can have a laugh or two and that it will help you giggle through the craziness of motherhood.
- Near Christmas time, our little cherubs enjoyed acting out the Nativity story while their father read the words describing the Savior’s birth from the Bible. The kids and Dad got a little bit carried away with the whole thing and our daughter was fed up. She stood up and said, “I think I’m in the wrong fairy tale!” and she left.
- We had a small strawberry patch in our backyard. One day while picking berries with my second daughter, I asked her if she liked strawberries. She smiled and nodded her head vigorously. I said, “Me too.” She then replied, “Me five!”
- I took four of my children shopping for school clothes one morning. It had been a long ordeal and everyone was exhausted from walking through the stores. I looked down and noticed that my five-year-old daughter was carrying her shoes and walking barefoot through the mall. When I promptly asked her why she replied, “My shoes were tired, Mom, so I had to carry them.”
Every mother has humorous stories of her own she could tell, but sometimes just a good motherhood joke or anecdote is just the ticket to help us keep our perspective and enjoy the journey of parenthood as we wrestle with the day-to-day doldrum of being a mom. I hope these tickle your funny bone like they did mine.
- A three-year-old went with his dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother there were two boy kittens and two girl kittens. “how did you know? his mother asked. “Daddy picked them up and looked underneath,” He replied. “I think it’s printed on the bottom”
- Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together in Church. Joel giggled and sang and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. “You’re not supposed to talk out loud in church.” “Why? Who’s going to stop me?” Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, “See those two men standing by the door? They’re hushers?”
- A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy Mother,” she asked, “is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest in the family) answered, “Thou shalt not kill.”
- Mom: Eat your spinach, Kimberly. It will put color in your cheeks.
Kimberly: But, Mom, who wants green cheeks?
- Lance, age four, was very cross at the supper table.
“The trouble with you is” said his mother, “you didn’t take a nap this afternoon.”
Lance looked at his mother directly and said, “Yes, and what’s your trouble.”
- Aunt Barbara: Does your baby sister talk yet, Susan?
Susan: No, she doesn’t have to. She gets everything she wants just by howling and yelling.
- My husband was watching a ballgame on TV when our 4-year-old, Ashley, walked into the room and asked, “Why aren’t they playing?” He told her, “They have a time-out.” Ashley replied, “The whole team? They must have been really bad!” —Jo Whitaker, Boston
- Recently there were tremors in a California town, and the townspeople got nervous. One couple sent their little boy to stay with an aunt and uncle in another town, explaining that the impending earthquake was the reason for the visit.
- A few days later the parents got a short letter: “We’re returning your boy. Send the earthquake.”
- An honest seven-year-old admitted calmly to her parents that Billy Brown had kissed her after class. “How did that happen?” gasped her mother. “It wasn’t easy,” admitted the young girl, “but three girls helped me catch him.”
- My 5-year-old grandson, Michael, called his mom from his friend Eric’s house one day and confessed he had accidentally broken a vase. Then he added, “You don’t have to worry about buying another one though! Eric’s mom said it was irreplaceable.” —Joan Jordan, Boston
- A mom texts her teenage son while he’s out with friends: “Hi! What do IDK, LY and TTYL mean?” He texts back, “I don’t know, love you and talk to you later.” The mom replies, “It’s okay, don’t worry about it. I’ll ask your sister. Love you!”
- One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked. “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?” Her mother replied, “Well, every time you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white. “ The little girl thought about this revelation for a minute and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”
There are some jokes and quotes that only a mother will understand and appreciate. The rest of the world is oblivious, but we know!
- Being a mother of a teenager is finally understanding why some animals eat their young.
- Showering as a mom should be an Olympic sport: Everyone’s yelling your name, you have to beat the clock, and you rarely win a medal.
- Important truth no one tells a first-time mom: Both of you come home from the hospital in diapers.
- Good moms let you lick the beaters after making brownies, great moms turn them off first.
- When your teenager asks for personal space and you remind her that she came out of your personal space.
- Note to all moms of teens, keep a dog. That way, someone is excited to see you!
- I used to think I was a morning person, but then I had kids. Now, I’m more of a “give me all the coffee” person.
- Motherhood is like a fairy tale but in reverse. You begin in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after people.
- I love all my children equally. Except for the one that sleeps… I love that one more.
- Cleaning with children in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos.
- Every day when you’re raising kids, you feel like you could cry or crack up and just scream, ‘This is ridiculous!’ Because there’s so much nonsense, whether it’s what they’re saying to you or the fact that there’s avocado or poop on every surface. – Kristen Bell
- “Sleep at this point is just a concept. Something I’m looking forward to investigating in the future.” – Amy Poehler
- First baby: You start wearing maternity clothes as soon as the test is positive. Second baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. Third baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.
- Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother’s Day morning. As she lay there looking forward to breakfast in bed, the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen. But after a good long wait, she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs. “As a surprise for Mother’s Day,” one explained, “We decided to cook our own breakfast.”
Always remember, in the world of parenting, laughter truly is the best medicine. All we can really do is try our best and set aside enough money for therapy.
